community is

In January 2000, I lead my first retreat as a youth leader. It was cold.. the cabins had little heat, and the food was so, so. It was a really good weekend. Traveling with us as the speaker was Ron Willoughby, who at that time was the pastor of our church, New Hope.

One of the boys on the trip insisted on bringing his personal CD player, before MP3 players folks, and furthmore insisted on listening to it pretty much non-stop even though our rules prohibited the use of them outside the cabins. So I did what any typical green youth leader would do, I pulled him aside, instructed him on when he could and couldn't use the headphones, and deposited him back into the gen-pop if the youth. My talk did absolutely no good, and about an hour later I noticed the headphones glued to his head again. At this sighting, and in front of the other leaders and youth who were in the room, I walked over, demanded he turn over the headphones to me, and that he would not be using them for the duration of the trip. I thought I had asserted myself, and my authority.

Later that evening we had planned a bon-fire for the youth. The plan was for the 2 adult (me and ron) leaders to sneak out of the evening lesson time, and build a fire. As we were gathering our coats to head out, Ron pulled me aside and told me to invite the youth whom I had confiscated the CD player from a few hours earlier. When I questioned Ron about it. He looked at me and said somthing like, "Nels, you were right to have taken his CD player, however you did it in a way that embarrassed him in front of his peers. If you are going to take away you need to give back more. And what he needs now is for an adult to invest in his life. So he'll come build the fire with us." He did, and we did spend some time talking with him and investing time.

The point here is we have to give back more than we take from others. I'll never be a perfect person, who has the perfect answers to all the questions, or acts the right way in every situation. I can, though, make sure when I steal, I replace tenfold. And when I don't steal, I invest in the lives of others just the same.

Posted by Bigsun at 3:04 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

We attended chuch at New Hope last evening. It was nice to be among friends. As I come to this realization that perhaps our exit from New Hope was self induced and not realy because of the selfish reasons I touted 2 years ago, I wonder why I really left. I say "I" vice "we" because the decision was primarily mine, Lynn merey went along with me.

I have been very critical of Rick Warren and his references to the phrase "Will anyone be in heaven because of you?". And while I still think that phrase is off-base, I think the answer is "yes". I learned this week at my small group meeting that my friends were beside me, even if I didn't reaize it. I learned that some thought I had somthing important to say. So the answer to Rick Warrens question has to be yes. However I didn't do anything earthshattering, I didn't layout the gospel in a consise relatable way, I didn't offer to pray the sinners prayer with anyone. But I was there. I was in hundreds of small groups meetings, I had thousands of conversations, and worked in ministry with many many fellow beleivers. Perhaps we roll the whole evangelisim model into a package. That package includes a 8 part message, a prayer, a package of tears, and celebration. When a follower of christ uses this package more followers are added to the fold. Yeah, Right! It's about the realtionship folks. At camp in 1985 I received the "package", in 1998 at a small group at New Hope I started to receive the relationship. We all need to wake up about this.

Todays devotional talks about how we grow spiritually in the presence and fellowiship of others. So with that thought, yes, I have influenced the spritiual lives of others, and others have done the same for me. It's been subtle, but it exists.

Posted by Bigsun at 8:19 AM | Permalink | | links to this post

I have been refleecting alot this week on my mission trip to Mexico in 2003. I decided to post my journal from that trip.

Matamoros Journal
Spent the evening typing the journal I kept while on a missions trip to Matamoros Mexico. The posts are below.

posted by Bigsun at 10:55 PM

Day 1 | Sat, July 12, 2003 | 11:30PM
Day spent traveling. 6:45am in Airport. Shared the plane from Houston to Harlingen with a large group headed to the same place. After a long, long wait at the airport we were picked up and headed for the border. God was with us because our border crossing went well, was quick, and without incident. We then drove through Matamoros. I’ll stop short of describing Matamoros, however I’ll never consider myself struggling ever again. God has given me a gift that I take all too much for granted. Mexico will change me, how I don’t know, but it will.

posted by Bigsun at 10:53 PM

Day 3 | Mon July 14, 2003 | 11:00 PM

Psalm 149:4 “For the Lord takes delight in his people”

Today I went to an unimaginable place. A place where kids wore clean clothes, wore smiles on their faces, and were amazed by bubbles. Traveling with us today is a group of puppeteers, and a group of VBS leaders all making complete fools of themselves. I could have easily been in Pasadena, Glen Burnie, or South Philadelphia. But I was in Matamoros Mexico. And if I believe the verse above, God take pleasure in the people here, the same as I. And, I am drawn to love them, not because I have things they don’t, but simply because God loves them, and that’s all that really matters.

posted by Bigsun at 10:52 PM

Day 4 | Tues July 15, 2003
God has brought together a uniquely divers group. Many are strangers to each other; nearly all are strangers to me. And, at the risk of sounding sappy, the folks here will be etched into my mind. Tonight the director of the orphanage gave his testimony to us. It relates to my own testimony in that, while I am been a follower of Christ for nearly 5 years now, I still have not curbed my quest for success and status. This is where this trip will change me, because his example is inspiring. These friends I have also met will change me. Community, Love, God.
posted by Bigsun at 10:51 PM
Day 5 | Wed July 16, 2003
Three givens in VBS law:

1.Messages and interactions are short
2 Snacks are a good thing
3. Jump Rope is a universal language

In Acts 2 we are shown the power of Community to reach people. Our group has gelled, and we now will work together. It’s short tonight.

posted by Bigsun at 10:51 PM

Day 6 | Thurs July 17,2003 | 10:00PM
Tonight’s worship time may have been one of the most worshipful environments I have ever been in. Kelly gave her testimony. She held the room, shared her heart, and explained where God has lead her, where He is leading her, and where she is coming from. It was special. Then Barbara spoke about her life and testimony. God is always there, He always wants us to worship. He has been waiting for me to worship for years.

posted by Bigsun at 10:50 PM

Day 8 | Sat July 19, 2003 9:00AM
We have now been deposited again in the Harlingen TX airport. There is not much here to do, which is why have decided to journal. With a clean bathroom, gift shop, and Café, Harlingen in a clean, tidy and respectable place. I spent an hour or so combing through the local newspaper, and found that the city of Harlingen and south Texas are not a lot different than home. They have drug-busts; drive-bys, and even scholastic award winners. And to be completely honest this may be my “take away” from this week in Matamoros. Nothing I did, or said, or place I went, really “shows” what life is like on the muddy streets of Matamoros. Nothing I did can cure the disease found on those streets. As we were leaving the VBS site on Friday, two vans of Dentists, and Doctors, and Nurses arrived to give medical attention to the same neighborhood where I had spent my week. And I can’t help but to think that their recollection of that neighborhood will be the same as mine.

Our last day of VBS saw 125 children from the neighborhood. Each kid smiled, and laughed, and played. In this respect children in Matanoros, are the same as kids in Pasadena.

Money is the difference

This week I found that money really is the only thing separating the way I live, and the way those in Matamoros live. Certainly there are social and spiritual and cultural differences. The poorest in my community in Pasadena, live a life better than the richest in the community we served in Matamoros.

So what does this teach me?

Every single person on the planet is the same in God’s eyes. I am called out to tell about Christ, and that 125 children heard the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ yesterday, that normally would not have heard it.

I learned that I am extremely fortunate to have been born in the USA. When I look at the bounty God has give me because of the geographic location of my birth, I wonder why that bounty could not be spread equally to everyone. The only conclusion I have to this thought is that perhaps the wealth does not really matter. In fact, Gods love is equal for everyone. That is why I came here. Because God loves all without finding fault.

John 3:16-17

For God so loved the WORLD that he gave his only So, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God did NOT send his Son into the WORLD to condemn it, but to save it.

posted by Bigsun at 10:49 PM

Posted by Bigsun at 4:11 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

Ok so my initial furvor of reading daily has come and gone. I expected that, especially because I have been so long without a daily quiet time with God. However, just because I haven't chronicled the past week and a half, there have been some significant changes in my relationship with God.

At this weeks small group meeting I shared alot about my struggles in the past. Especially with our business closing in '04, and our decision to leave New Hope shorly thereafter. It felt really good to talk about some of the stuff I needed to say to some close friends for a long time. I have come to the conclusion that if my relationship with God is going to imporve, I have to trust that God will work through me AND the Church. Bot of those things are important. First I must trust that I am who God says I am. And second I must share my life with my fellow believers.

Posted by Bigsun at 3:53 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way

Posted by Bigsun at 6:31 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

We is more important than Me

Quite easier put into words than into practice. In fact, I am not sure I buy it at all these days. Life keeps letting us down, people around us let us down, friends let us down. At some point we lose faith in "We" and opt for "Me".

Sometimes I think my life has surpassed my faith. Sometimes I wornder how strong a faith I really ever had. What I mean is its really hard to live the life I had a few years ago, even it was the shallow Christian faith I sometimes think it was. Differences: my home, my job, and my church, have placed different emphasis on the daily walk of my life, and that walk frankly has been away from God.

I am conforted by Phil. 1:27 to know that others are struggling with me to tell the world about the real love of God, the good news. However, I fear I've forgotten the news altogether.

Now that I've identified this, I can work through it. Through prayer and deliberate, and quite honestly unconfortable, time alone with God. So to list anyone at this point on a list of people to pray for would be fruitless. Not impossible, or out of the realm of the near future. But not today. Sorry Mr. Warren, I can't fill out the circle of life right now.

Posted by Bigsun at 4:30 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

Came across the following blog while browsing at Will Sampson's blog. It is written by Tom Fox, who was recently killed in Iraq for sharing his faith.

Waiting In the Light

Posted by Bigsun at 4:46 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

First: I must air a fustration. Today's "Question to Consider" is: Will anybody be in heaven because of you?

No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How dare I presume that any action I take on behalf of God has any bearing on weather any person will reach heaven on account of me. It's Gods work not my own. To presume I had anything to do with the salvation of someone else would be mocking God.

Okay... now that I have that off my chest.


Todays memory verse, col 4:5, is awesome, but not as awesome as the verse right after it, verse 6:

Let your conversations be full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you will know how to answer everyone.

seasoned with salt= To speak with substance or flavor

Application: We should be careful not to merely throw words at people. But rather speak intelligently and respectfullly to them. We should express our emotions to them about God in ways that endere our conversation, and the listener to our cause; Jesus came to show us how to love.

Posted by Bigsun at 3:26 PM | Permalink | | links to this post

Hello,

Tonight I hope to return to a small group for the purpose of learning what God has to say to me, and to re-learn what it means to be be in a community of committed followers of Jesus. The topic of our small group is 40 Days of Community. Stay tuned for my thoughts and study as we work through the material.

Bigsun

Posted by Bigsun at 1:22 PM | Permalink | | links to this post